How I disovered true happiness ?
Are you living your life? Or is it influenced by others?Just give a thought about all the things you do in a day. How does it make you feel? Do you feel happy? Do you feel content? Do you feel even if you die today, you will die happy?
Most of the time we keep on delaying our happiness. I will be happy when I get this job. I will be happy when I marry this person. I will be happy when I buy this house. Who knows if you will even see tomorrow? Then was all this wait worth it? So, now you will have this question- what should I do then? Should I spend all the money that I have saved to buy my house on a trip to Europe, because that will make me happy? Or should I spend my child’s college fund on partying? Because YOLO!
Well, I am not talking about any of this. If such thoughts are coming to your mind, then you are still looking for happiness externally.
Hmmm…looking for happiness internally. What does it even mean?I have struggled with this question as much as you are fighting with it in your mind right now. I have tried to find happiness, in other’s definition of happiness. Tried to do everything that falls under the definition of happiness of what the people around me defined. Chasing dreams which I never even wanted to follow. Not that I was forced into in but I didn't know any better. The deeper I got in my work, I understood this is very opposite of what I value in life.
After years of struggle, reading loads of self-help books, trying anything and everything from fitness to finance to NLP, finding happiness through law of attraction, spirituality, morning and evening rituals, self care, self love and what not. I have realised, I am still looking for that inner happiness. BUT…
… Here is the most interesting part. When I look at the past 2-3 years of my life, when I was doing all of this, I feel happy. I never realised in the moment, that I was doing the exact things that made me happy but I never acknowledged it. This is what I love doing. Self- education is the best Education. Learning has always been my favourite hobby.
The only thing that has changed now is that I acknowledge that happiness in every moment.
How can my story be helpful to you?
When I decided I was not happy in my life. I had nothing, I don't mean materialistically. In fact, materially I had more that I could ask for. I was living in a sea- faced apartment in a posh society of Mumbai, with more than everything. So when I say I had nothing, I kind of mean I had no character. I was not proud of the person I was. I felt terrible, at times I felt nothing. But when I decided to change my life, I listened to my heart. I started doing things that made me feel GOOD (not happy because at that time I didn't even know what happy meant). Slowly I added more things that I loved doing. Mostly, stopped doing things that didn't add value to my life. I spent most of my time reading and researching. And I learned, this is what I love- Reading, Researching and Learning.
When you stop living by the definition of others and start making you own path, you start building the life that you love. Yes, it is very difficult at the beginning and you face a lot of adversity. But from what I have learned, adversities should be celebrated, because that means you are doing something right. You will face problems in life, in fact you are still facing your set of problems right now. Problems are inevitable but you have the privilege of choosing your problems.
Now, that you have a choice, I would say take that leap of faith and choose a slightly better problem. Happiness is not something that will happen to you in future. Happiness is in doing.